Sharks, Spiders and Snakes...oh my!

I often brag about Australia’s natural beauty – white sand beaches, turquoise waters, endless sunshine - but below the rolling waves and amongst the soft sands lies a world a little less beautiful and a little… more… evil. Somewhere down the list behind Paul Hogan, kangaroos, and blond surfer types sits Australia’s reputation for exceptional and sometimes dangerous wildlife.

Just like the rest of us, evil loves the longer days and warmer weather. Today we made a post-lunch trip to the beach. On our way, we ran into a friend of a friend. With Bronson in tow he asked if we were headed to Leighton Dog Beach. (we were) “They just closed Leighton an hour ago – a Great White was spotted along the coast” he said. My initial thought was not one of fear but one of disappointment that we’d have to drive further north to the next dog beach. During the warmer months helicopters patrol the coastline for the rogue Great White or Hammerhead and every few weeks or so a shark is spotted and a beach is closed. By the time we arrived at Leighton the beach had reopened but the wind kept us out of the water and our beach trip was a brief one.

A few weeks ago Shane and I went out to our backyard shed at 6am, rubbing our eyes and stumbling over our pj’s. I was going out to gather some items for a fundraiser that day and Shane was accompanying me. “Oh shit, that’s a big Redback” said Shane. Redbacks are a poisonous and deadly spider – a relative of the Black Widow yet much less elusive. Shane took off his thongs (flip-flops of course) and before I could panic it was dead. At that moment I recalled a friend recently saying that she had just spayed for Redbacks. Do normal Australian’s spray for Redbacks in the spring? Should we be spraying for Redbacks? Bugs I can handle. Spiders I cannot. Even a five year old’s crayola rendition of a spider sends tingles down my spine.

And then there are snakes. They say Australia is home to six of the world's top ten deadliest snakes. I’ve never had an unfortunate run in with a snake (knock on wood). However, I once watched a woman leap as if she were walking over hot coals in order to avoid a snake on the sidewalk. The snake was clearly contemplating suicide on a busy suburban road.

Perth golfers have lost thousands of balls to the bush. The risk-benefit ratio of recovering a lost ball vs. being bitten by a Dugite is indisputable. Just this week two men who were playing golf south of Perth, ventured into the bush in search of a lost ball and came across a human skeleton, presumed to be dead for two years. Clearly the murderer figured no one in their right mind would venture into the bush in search of a lost ball.

But sometimes evil lurks where you least expect it. When playing golf last year (avoiding Dugites) I parked my golf cart along the fairway while waiting for my teammates to tee off. Before I could take my foot off the break a growl, not dissimilar to a dog’s growl, came from my left. A kangaroo (bigger and taller than me) was not too happy that I was blocking his view of the tee. I swiftly yet quietly continued onward.

But of all the dangers mentioned thus far, no creature provides a greater threat than the bird. Springtime is swooping season for Magpies protecting their young. Walkers, cyclists and moped-riding postmen are all at risk. Other species of birds, who are not typical swoopers, have inherited the habit of the Magpie. Earlier this week Bronson was repeatedly pecked on the back by a Sparrow. My dog was beat up by a Sparrow. Bronson can expect to be swooped half a dozen times during a thirty minute walk yet he’s too busy with his nose to the ground to know that he’s under attack. We’re thankful that his presence is a distraction from ours.

And then there are the excessive flies, massive mosquitoes, household ants and crickets…..

Jurien Bay

Tomorrow we celebrate the Queen’s birthday. It isn’t actually the Queen’s birthday. Her birthday is April 21st. And in fact, the rest of Australia celebrates her birthday in June. There are some things I don’t question, particularly if it means I get a day off work.

We decided to take advantage of the extra day and go camping for a night. No fishing boat or serious camping gear – just a tent, dog, bathers, books and a bottle of wine. Jurien Bay was our destination - 2.5 hours north of Perth on what they call the turquoise coast. The town itself is nothing more than the basics – groceries, liquor, hardware, fuel, and about half a dozen places to eat. I didn’t notice any hotels but there are a handful of chalets, condos, and homes to rent and of course camping. Thanks to a scattering of islands, this area is a popular spot to fish and shelter yourself from what can be a windy west coast.

It was lunch by the time we rolled into town yesterday. After pitching our tent we went for a drive just south of town and found a two kilometer off-road track leading to the beach. Here we parked our car on the beach, set-up our chairs, listened to the AFL Grand Final, and read. For three hours our only beach mates included a group of boys tearing down the beach on motorbikes and a seagull that tormented Bronson, providing us some entertainment. In the end the seagull won because Bronson ate something (a dead fish most likely) that made him violently ill for the next three hours. I’m glad no one else was around to witness his suffering.

This morning we packed up early and headed twenty minutes up the road to Lesueur National Park. Lesueur contains 900 different species of Flora, 10% of what is found in WA. Remember that WA is a very big place so some people may find this to be a very big deal. We drove the 18km track through the park and watched kangaroos jump through the bush land. Before our slow and scenic drive back down to Perth we stopped off at Grigson lookout for a final view of the vast bush land, shallow salt lakes, white sand dunes, turquoise ocean and the islands that lay on the horizon.

As we drove we passed a vast field of lavender flowers and hundreds of balga trees jutting out of the shallow grasslands. Balga is the Aboriginal word for black boy so these trees are also sometimes called black boys. Its long narrow body and bushy head remind me of another tree that lives in another arid land thousands of miles away – the Joshua tree in America’s southwest.

One of my favorite things about this region are the white sand dunes – sometimes grouped together in rolling hills like a scene out of a star wars movie and at other times sitting in solitude – rising out of the stubby green bush like clean white bed linens hanging in the sun amongst a backdrop of crisp green grass. It was a particularly windy today as we drove down the two-lane highway back to Perth. You could see the white sands swiftly blowing from the peaks out into the bright blue sky. At a glance, I could have been in Colorado, watching the wind whip the snow off the mountain peaks, on one of those days where a clear blue sky follows a day of heavy snow and everything is white and new. And just like Colorado, two hours later I was miles away from the peaceful peaks and back in the city.

sandy cape

 sandy cape

 salt lakes

 track to the beach

 alone on the beach

 salt lakes, sand dunes and ocean

 lavender flowers

 "black boys"

can you spot the roo at Lesueur?

joy riding

Dear Oprah

I understand you’re heading Down Under and bringing 300 of your biggest fans.

Your announcement, which unfolded as we slept, hit Australia’s shores Tuesday morning with a bang so loud one can only assume it reached the vast dusty spaces of this desolate island country. Your impending visit is providing hope for a struggling tourism industry and also providing a few giggles over your Aussie pronunciations – don’t worry, I get it too.

We have yet to hear the full list of destinations that you and your guests will visit, but I can only presume you will remain predominately in the eastern portion of the country. I understand. Most overseas visitors with only a week or two to spare will visit Sydney, Melbourne, the Great Barrier Reef and possibly the Gold Coast, Ayres Rock, the Great Ocean Road, or even the Hunter Valley or Barossa Valley wine regions.

While Australia boasts some beautiful cities (the Sydney Harbour is unrivalled), the real highlight is its dramatic landscapes, quiet isolation, and the ancient history of the indigenous culture. It’s the opportunity to connect with nature and with landscapes, flora, and fauna found nowhere else on the planet, that make this country so special.

Since your Ultimate Australian Adventure may not head west, I wanted to share with you now, some of the wonderful things that Western Australia (WA) has to offer. The state of Western Australia covers 2.5 million square kilometers, or 1/3 of the continent - that’s about four times the size of Texas. Now consider that WA is home to only 2.2 million people (smaller than the city of Chicago), 1.7 million of which live in the Perth metropolitan area, making Perth one of the most isolated cities in the world.

The wide open spaces of WA are home to the Margaret River wine region in the southwest. Here you can indulge in local wines and olives, surf some of the world’s best waves, explore ancient caves, and watch Humpback Whales play in the Indian Ocean. Not far from here you’ll find the largest truffle producer in the Southern Hemisphere. All this makes the southwest of Australia a foodies delight.

Now head north up the coast past Perth, the sunniest capital city in Australia and home to the most beautiful city beaches, and continue along hundreds of kilometers of open road (trying not to hit any kangaroos along the way) and you’ll come across the Ningaloo Reef, a 260km fringing reef, one of the largest in the world. Hopefully, you enjoy camping because accommodations are sparse. Days are spent sunning on white sands, exploring the reef, swimming with Whale Sharks or catching your next meal.

Continue heading northwest along the coast and you’ll come to Broome, the pearling capital of the world. In the same region you’ll also find one of the largest diamond mines in the world, the Argyle Diamond mine, home to the rare pink diamond. Australia’s northwest is not only home to precious jewels, but also some amazing scenery including towering waterfalls, glorious gorges, and the beehive like sandstone domes called the Bungle Bungles. This region is everything you’d expect of the Australian outback.

I’ve only touched upon a few of WA’s unique assets. From what I hear, Tourism WA is fighting hard for WA to get a look in when you visit in December. And rightly so. We have much to offer but are often overlooked because, well, we’re so far away and have so few people. But, you like to root for the little guy, right? Oh, and don’t use the word “root” when you get here. I’ll explain later.

Please know, I’d make a wonderful host. After all, I am a former Chi-town lady. I understand the effect that endless sunshine and white sand beaches can have on a women plucked out of a frigid Chicago winter. Well, you know where to find me.

Virtual Seasons

It’s about that time - the time of year that a subtle twinge of homesickness creeps in. The changing seasons always bring out a bit of longing – even more so than holidays, because each new season brings a temporary yet reoccurring shift in lifestyle - with its own unique bundle of memories and a holiday is one portion of that bundle.

But it’s this particular time of year that gets me the most – the beginning of fall back home. Summer is by far my favorite season no matter where I am, but fall elicits more memories than any other time of year. Fall includes my two favorite holidays (Halloween and Thanksgiving), my birthday, a new school year, and a dramatic shift in the landscape – one that I do not get in Perth. Even when it’s fall in Perth, it’s not fall, but autumn - as I’ve rudely been reminded in the past.

Thanks to modern technology, the beginning of fall has been shoved in my face, and no where worse than on facebook. Here I’m confronted with status updates cheering on the beginning of the football season, comments on final lake house trips and changing leaves, and back to school photos. Please stop. I don’t want to know about the first sighting of Halloween candy or opening day of the ski season.

Adding to my sadness is the fact that this month I’m missing the wedding of one of my dearest friends and come November the birth of my brother’s first child. With weddings and babies come online gift registries. Even Pottery Barn with its textured fall patterns and pumpkin spiced candles is teasing me. Damn you Pottery Barn! And you too Crate and Barrel!

But, don’t play a sad song for me quite yet. Any day now I’ll be basking in the heat of the West Australian sun and turning circles in the waves of the Indian Ocean. However, when the candy corn does hit the shelves, please don’t forget to send me a bag.

Politics. Aussie style.

Just like a politician, I’m breaking my promise. On June 27th I talked about the political coup that saw Julia Gillard replace Kevin Rudd as Australia’s Prime Minister, resulting in Australia’s first female Prime Minister. At this time I promised that I would never again mention politics. But the events that have taken place between then and now are just too good not to share.

On July 17th, only three weeks after becoming Prime Minister, Julia Gillard called a federal election for August 21st. Elections are held at least every three years and with the last election being held in November 2007 and the PM holding the power to call an election, Ms. Gillard took advantage while still riding strong on the wave of capitalizing on the former PM’s pitfalls. This announcement was followed by five weeks of non-stop campaigning between the two major parties – Labor (left) and Liberal (right), because at the end of the day, the people vote for the party and not the candidate. Although you wouldn’t know it. And remember, the party has the right to change their leader and thus influence who sits as Prime Minister.

Voting is compulsory in Australia so on Saturday, August 21st Shane went into the local elementary school and voted as I sat in the car reading the paper and sipping my coffee. That night we sat at a friend’s house and watched the results roll in. In order to be deemed the winner, at least 76 out of the 150 seats in the House of Representatives must be won. As it turned out, each party won 72 seats resulting in a hung parliament, leaving the final decision in the hands of the one Greens seat and five Independents. The Greens party, as one may assume in this day and age, primarily represent environmental issues.

Over the past two weeks the Labor and Liberal parties wheeled and dealed with the six men who had the power to get their party to 76 seats. Yesterday agreements were made and Labor remains on top with 76 seats vs. Liberal’s 74 seats.

Now in the aftermath no one really appears happy – not surprising. An argument circling the media is that the Liberal party actually won more individual votes. The top issues? Refugees, climate change, a super profits tax on mining companies, housing affordability, and infrastructure. But the issue that apparently sealed the deal was a $43 billion dollar national broadband network. Life, liberty, justice, and high speed internet for all.

Two years and counting

Holy S*#t! I can’t believe it’s been two years since Shane and I left the UK to move Down Under. They say as you get older the hands on the clock tick faster. Add in a few life changing moments including two international moves, new career, marriage, and time can play some funny tricks on you. While the days and nights inbetween may appear fuzzy, the important moments remain frozen in time.

I remember August 28, 2008 as if it were today. We celebrated our last night in England with each of our favorite meals – take-away Chinese from the shop below our flat for Shane and take-away Indian from the village for me. We left our newly renovated flat in pristine condition, ready for the tenant who moved in that same day. As it’s still our flat, someday we’ll be back to say hello, making the experience even more familiar.

Our flight to the US was departing at 11am. Before sunrise, we left our home (southwest of London) in order to be in Essex (northeast of London) at 7am when the doors opened to the shipping company where we would leave our car to be shipped to Australia. We said good-bye to the car, a very small classic car, crammed with as many of our personal belongings as we could manage and rushed to Heathrow airport, nearly two hours away. Fighting time, we decided in advance that the only way to make it from Essex to Heathrow and not miss our flight was to rent a car.

Right on track with not a minute to spare we dropped off the rental car and shuttled it to our terminal, only to discover that we were in the wrong terminal. Waiting for the tram would put us at risk for missing our flight so we paid ten pounds to take a taxi from terminal five to terminal four. With four suitcases checked in containing nearly every item we owned (aside from what we could cram in the car) we slid onto the plane with plenty of time to reflect on what lie behind and what lay ahead.

The next ten days were spent in limbo with my family and friends in the US. This too is a very clear time consisting of a lake house holiday, shopping, Mexican food and some very sad good-byes. On September 11th, we landed in our new home country. Our car with the remainder of our material possessions arrived four months later - just in time for Christmas, making it a Christmas filled with gifts we forgot we even owned.

This move was particularly monumental for Shane who had spent the last seven years living in England and was finding himself acclimating to a home that now felt like a foreign land. After 2.5 years of living overseas (in the UK and Australia) I feel I’m now at the point where I can sympathize with Shane’s struggles.

I wish I had done a better job documenting my initial days living in Australia. It’s now difficult to recall the emotions and impressions that filled my head during that time. It’s even more difficult to elicit those thoughts because what was then my initial impressions of life in OZ are now a way of life, no longer foreign concepts but the norm.

As I write this blog I find myself naturally replacing my z’s with s’s and my o’s with ou’s. On my third trip back to the US, I struggled for the first time to drive on the right side of the road. I find myself getting passionate about issues which are important to Australian’s and the slang that leaves my mouth is Aussie not American. The accent is no longer an accent but a native sounding tongue. Of course, the sound of my own voice brings me back home but even that too has changed a bit and is unfortunately completely out of my control.

Only in my dreams, do I sometimes drive on the right side of the road, through the winding mountain roads of Colorado, the green lush suburbs of St. Louis, or the busy city streets of Chicago. After all, I am an American. Even a million miles away from America, you are still surrounded by America. But now, I experience it through the eyes of the Australian nighttime news, the latest films, and weekly gossip magazines.

I’ve read a few books by the author Bill Bryson. As an American married to a British woman, he spent nearly twenty years living overseas. Upon his return to the US he wrote a book titled “I’m a stranger here myself.” I look forward to seeking solace in this book upon my eventual return to the US with some good old-fashioned Bill Bryson humor. In the meantime, I’ll live as an American vicariously through family, friends, and mass media. I’ll continue to enjoy Australia’s finer attributes but will miss endless restaurant options, shopping at all hours of the day, the latest technology at the cheapest prices and most of all my family and friends.

Lose yourself in Western Australia

If I worked for Tourism WA, I’d implement the advertising slogan “Get lost in Western Australia” or maybe even “Western Australia. Escape civilization”

Ok, so both these slogans elicit negative and positive connotations. If you’ve heard of the 2005 horror flick Wolf Creek, which surrounds the disappearance of backpackers in the WA outback and is based on true events, you may not want to "get lost" or "escape civilization" in WA. But all of us, at some point or another just want to get away from it all and escape the dramas of everyday modern life. And if that’s the case, then WA’s the place to do it.

The state of Western Australia covers 2.5 million square kilometers which equates to approximately 1 million square miles. To put that into perspective, that’s four times the size of Texas and larger than Western Europe. Physical size is irrelevant until you take into account Western Australia’s population which is a mere 2.3 million people, 1.7 million of which live in the Perth metropolitan area.

If I still haven’t captured your attention, imagine the following. Take the western portion of the US all the way to the eastern borders of New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, and Montana and add in, say, Kansas for good measure. That’s roughly the size of Western Australia. Place a metropolitan area about the size of Austin, TX somewhere in the vicinity of Los Angeles and then scatter another 600,000 people primarily along the coast. Separate Canada and Mexico by vast oceans, and you’ll have WA.

As a whole, despite Australia’s rather prominent stature on the world map as the island country in the Southern Hemisphere, it’s a rather lonely and desolate place. The remaining 20 million residents reside primarily along the east coast, separating West Australian’s from their neighbors by thousands of miles of outback desert. Compare this to the US where a population of 310 million is scattered about all nooks and crannies of the nation. Even the motherland, a much smaller island, is the home to 62 million people – three times the population of Australia. Maybe it’s not just the sunshine and hot weather that continues to attract and upward of 20,000 UK migrants to Australia each year.

I laugh every time Shane answers the question as to how he ended up in St. Louis as an 18 year old foreign exchange student. The answer is he didn’t have much choice. He knew nothing about St. Louis except that it was inland, but his perception of inland was Houston, TX not smack dab in the middle of America’s heartland. He was dropped into St. Louis, in the middle of August, in 100 degree heat with 200% humidity and no beach in sight.  Imagine his surprise.

Each time a friend back in the US talks about a trip to Chicago one weekend and San Francisco the next, I'm reminded that those days are over, as logistically (and financially), it’s just not possible in Australia.  Even our days of living in England, with cheap and easy European weekend trips at our fingertips, seem like a distant memory.  Tomorrow, I embark on my monthly two day pilgrimage to Sydney for work. Sydney, the largest city in Australia and one of only five with a population over 1 million - Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Perth and finally Adelaide, being the closest of the lot to Perth at 2,700km away. This business trip is the extent of my plane hopping mini-breaks these days.

Most short-lived getaways for those in Perth are done by car and for the pleasure of lounging on the beach away from the city, surfing big waves, catching massive fish, or exploring the vineyards of Margaret River - and relaxation and beautiful scenery are high on the agenda. No fast paced cities and weekends filled with endless tourist traps - just peace and quiet and relaxation in a place where you can escape civilization and lose yourself in the millions of stars amongst the milky way.

Whitsunday Islands

We’ve been home for a day but my body still feels like it's on a sailboat swaying to the tune of a gentle ocean swell in the Whitsunday Islands. Over the course of a week Shane and I soaked in the sun on land and boat, fished, and explored the ocean reef from below by snorkel and scuba and from above by seaplane.

The Whitsunday Islands are made up of 74 islands off the Queensland coast and the Great Barrier Reef. Although coral grows quite freely around the islands, the Whitsundays are not considered a part of what they call the outer reef (Great Barrier Reef) which sits about a two hour boat ride from the mainland. Most of the islands are nothing but forested mountains jutting up from the aqua waters with only a handful of the islands containing resorts, some quite luxurious. Hamilton Island, the largest of the inhabited islands, is a town of its own complete with an airport.

If you haven’t heard of the Whitsunday Islands, maybe you’ve heard of two of its most famous icons – Whitehaven beach, consistently voted one of the world’s most beautiful beaches, and Heart Reef which you’ve probably seen a photo of at some point in your life even if you don’t realize it. The six kilometer Whitehaven beach, coupled with adjoining Hill Inlet, is a spectacular site and a bit of an anomaly. Tourism Australia would lead you to believe that the Whitsunday Islands are abound with soft white sand beaches but most of the island shores are made of rock and broken coral with very little beach. I suppose this is what makes Whitehaven so special.

Our trip got off to a bit of a rough start. We departed Perth at midnight and three and a half hours and two time zones later, we landed in Brisbane. It was 5am and we had another six hours till we caught our connecting flight to Proserpine Airport. I jokingly suggested that we get a hotel room and sleep for four hours. Shane quickly agreed and by 6am we were sound asleep at the Novotel hotel. At 9:30am my phone brought me out of a deep sleep. The catamaran that we were scheduled to depart on that night blew an engine and they needed to transfer us to another three night trip. Rather effortlessly we adjusted our hotel stay and were upgraded to what was considered a nicer tour. Crises averted.

The next day we departed on the Pacific Sunrise, a thirty-three meter sailing boat with nineteen other guests from Germany, France, Spain, Japan, the UK, the US and Australia. Despite some questionable weather, the boat, its fabulous crew of six and our wonderful shipmates made it a relaxing and enjoyable experience. The main activities consisted of snorkeling, scuba diving, kayaking, whale watching and relaxing.  Rarely did we leave the boat, except to get in the water and step ashore Whitehaven.

The remainder of the week we stayed in the coastal town of Airlie Beach. Airlie Beach is a small tourist town which serves as a hub for many of the island and reef tours of the Whitsundays. Airlie Beach got its origins as a backpacker town and still carries much of a backpacker feel with a wide variety of accommodations to suit all budgets and travel preferences. The hilly landscape provides magnificent views of the islands and the steep one kilometer walk from the town to our apartment was well worth the view, not to mention a relief from the guilt of gluttonous holiday eating.

Shane was keen to fish the east coast waters so after a morning of sitting by the pool indulging in gossip magazines, I spent an afternoon with six blokes on a seven meter fishing boat. There’s nothing like the launch of a fishing reel and the crack of a beer to shut up a group of men. It was all boys' talk for the first thirty minutes but when the engine stopped and the bait was hooked it was nothing but silence for the next three hours. Unfortunately, we didn’t catch anything worth photographing and our boat broke down causing a slow two hour sunset crawl back to Airlie Beach. Despite this, being out on the water with the sun beating down was enough to make me happy. I should also mention that I caught one of the only two fish that met the size requirements for keeping.

We saved the best for last – a seaplane trip to the outer reef. Along with eight other passengers and two crew we took a twenty minute plane ride over the islands to the outer reef where we landed on a small private pontoon and snorkeled for an hour with nothing in sight but multi-colored ocean. From there we flew to Whitehaven beach where we spent an hour lounging on the beach. Viewing the reef from above was like living inside a postcard. I could have stayed in the plane all day and never tire of the view.

The Whitsunday Islands may sound like paradise and in many ways it is. But as a West Australian I must point out a few subtle differences between us and our east coast friends that I feel you should be aware of before booking your flight. Being tropical, it rains, sometimes a lot along the Great Barrier Reef. Winter is the driest time and August the second driest month of the year yet we still battled a bit of rain one or two days. Our first visit to Whitehaven was overcast and unimpressive. On the other hand, the west coast is mostly dry and we can go for months without seeing a cloud.

Secondly, Jelly fish are rife in the northeast. Wetsuits or stinger suits are required between November and March, although the Pacific Sunrise required we still wear them this time of year. We did not wear them on the outer reef. Due to the stingers (and possibly also the dramatic tidal changes) many coastal towns have man-made lagoons for public swimming. The colder waters of the Indian Ocean keep the jelly fish at bay so we don’t require stinger suits but instead we live in fear of sharks so maybe not so much a win for us. Finally, the beaches. Growing up in WA, Shane is a beach snob as he’s been spoiled with a lifetime of beautiful beaches. To me, a beach is a beach but now that I live in WA I’m starting to understand.

Differences aside, I was sad to return to the real world and leave the Whitsunday Islands as only a memory.

 view from our Airlie Beach Apartment

 Heart Reef

 the white pontoon where we landed and snorkeled on the reef

 Whitehaven and Hill Inlet

some of the islands from above